I'm glad you are feeling better about this. It is amazing how sometimes feelings or reaction change like a coin being flipped. All chaos and then plop, there you go.
Hopefully she will get her batteries charging again and be able to "plug back into"" your relationship. That is what happened with Cajun and I when I first started exploring poly. The more love there is around the more love there is to share.
And we are here in case those boogey thoughts starts coming back tomorrow while she's out. <hugs>