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Old 04-10-2014, 02:50 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Haltom City, TX
Posts: 1,286

Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
we will use protection with the new person until such time and all of us (including new partner) feel unanimously comfortable with no protection.
I don't think there is anything wrong with her asking.
Personally I think there is something wrong with asking. The request itself is a red flag to me which would *immediately* prompt a discussion about expectations regarding how we relate. Now, what I am in favor of is discussing fluid bonding openly, asking that "if you have unsafe play in X ways, let me know so that we can move back to protection until we discuss it again". To me, that is a boundary which is purely requesting that my partners respect my health as they would their own and inform me of any changes PRIOR to our having sexy play again.

As and example: IV and I were fluid bonding for a time and I was using protection with my other partners. I ended up having some play with one partner which could be construed as risky so before IV and I had sex again I just told her and asked her if we needed to go back to condoms. She said 'yes' and thanked me. Then once I was retested again and all was well we went back to fluid bonding. No rules, no one controlling someone elses actions, just adults being honest and taking care of themselves.

BUT, I don't approach dating as a team sport.
Independent (Anarchist) Non-Monogamy

Me: male, 40, straight, single
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