Originally Posted by opalescent
My relationship with Whip started out as fuckbuddies, grew into FWB and is now more serious. I'm not opposed to this idea at all. I think it's odd to go on every date thinking 'Is this the One?'. Talk about expectations! But, I also don't want to be approached as 'Insert Tab A into Slot B'. Unfortunately that is the feel of many of my messages.
Oh, relationships can and do evolve, certainly, and I don't believe in the concept of "the One" to begin with. But I personally have no interest in casual sex. For me to be willing to have sex with someone, I need to trust them enough that they are at the very least a good friend. So, need to get to know them first.
If they're fine with that, knowing that we might never get to the point of sex, good. But a lot of guys interested in casual sex aren't willing to wait for sex, and would see even a strong friendship as a "loss" as far as outcomes go. So, incompatible wants/expectations there.
While I don't think everyone is like me, I also don't think I'm the only person who works that way, either. So saying you're looking for something committed doesn't translate necessarily to looking for "the One".