Originally Posted by Kernow
He is also worried about the new woman (J) being too needy/clingy. If he has picked up on that then I really don't think he should get involved - but of course that is his decision not mine.
This is true, but that does not mean you cannot use your influence with him to voice your objection to the matter and encourage him to seek a different, less clingy partner. That doesn't mean you're controlling him or anything, he'll still make his own choice, but sometimes it's the responsibility of loved ones to tell us when we're being careless, if we don't catch it ourselves.
A couple times, Gralson was wanting to get into BDSM playdates. I forget where he put his ads, Kijiji I think, when they still had personals... anyway, he kept getting replies from married women whose husbands weren't, or assumed wouldn't, be interested in Domming them. A couple times he brought me to meet them. I came along, it was just coffee after all. But every time, I spoke very clearly that I thought it was a terrible idea, helping some woman cheat on her husband. There was the whole ethics of cheating of course, and me not wanting any part of that... but also, the last thing I wanted was some big scary husband showing up at my door wanting to punch my husband's face in.