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Old 03-21-2014, 06:36 AM
Ryan3232 Ryan3232 is offline
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Malibu, CA
Posts: 34

Originally Posted by Dagferi View Post
I am in a polyandry situation and honestly Butch has had NO INVOLVEMENT in my finding a partner EVER including searching on line or in my relationship with Murf. Murf has no say in my relationship with Butch. I have no say in Butch's relationships with his play partners.

Honestly if she doesn't have time to search for partners herself then she doesn't have time to be dating.

I only answered based upon the information given. Despite my mad skills in many avenues in life. Mind reading is not one of them. I still stand by the view point that it may creep out potential partners for them to find out that she messaged them because her SO thought they might be someone she might like. Many do not like other people in their relationships.

Team dating doesn't usually work out too well. If I can find time to see my husbands around our heck schedules anyone can.

Butch works 3-11pm 8 days with 2 days off and then 7 days with 4 days off. Murf works 6pm to 6 am. 2 days on 2 days off. 3 days on 2 days off. 2 days on 3 days off. Both men have been stuck working mandatory overtime lately. Plus I work 40+ hours a week as personal assistant to a professional musician and 2-3 days a week as a veterinary technician at an emergency vet clinic on 12 hour shifts. Add on kid schedules with school, sports and etc. Yet I find the time to run 2 households and split my time as fairly as I can.
Well, quite honestly, your use of time seems to be very efficient. I am impressed.

While neither of us have kids, I work 50 hours a week at a law firm, then she works 16 hour days due to her involvement in Real Estate, Charity, and Film to name a few. I also help her out with side projects, so that another 10 hours per week.

I am not trying to compare it to your schedule; I am simply saying that it is difficult and challenging at times to the both of us. We have to be efficient. I am sure you could say we might be taking on too much, but neither of us want to work the rest of our lives. We would prefer to retire early, so that requires us to put in more work to achieve our dreams. This is a big year for the both of us, and we have to push in our professional/career goals while still staying sane with some semblance of a romantic life.

I do agree her messaging a potential partner on a partial recommendation from me is odd, but if the guy does not know, ignorance is bliss. But, frankly, Melissa would not hide that fact from them, she is very open and direct. So, if a guy were offended or weirded out, we would just move on to the next.

I appreciate your response, Dag.


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