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Old 03-19-2014, 01:42 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,204

Originally Posted by Bluebird View Post
I have never heard that saying, "First year forming, second year storming, third year norming." To be honest, I haven't had that experience with my other live-in relationships, but I will keep it in mind. Certainly I've only had two - my ex-husband who I was with for 12 years, and my current husband of 8 years - so I am by no means a pro at this! lol I will definitely keep it in mind.
I've never heard that saying either, but it sure rings true for me! I had that with my ex h, way back in the mid 70s. The "forming" NRE was amazing, but the 2nd year of storming was accomplished by me capitulating to monogamy when I really shouldn't have. Normal consisted of unspoken words and hiding things to "protect each other." No more! 2nd year of norming with my current 2 partners was completed with thorough openness and transparency. Not easy, but it makes that "norm" so much nicer and more real.

Did you have a lot of issues surrounding spillover noise from bedrooms? You mentioned you could hear your metamour outside your door during sex, that sounds awkward!
I know a lot of people struggle with hearing their partners have sex. I am lucky in that miss pixi finds it either a turn on or just sweet to hear me having sex with others. I've never heard her having sex as she hasn't had lovers over for sex. I did sit next to her former bf on his couch once, and he pulled her onto his lap. At one point, he bit her shoulder, and she squeaked, and later we saw she had a big bite mark. That was kind of weird, to know he'd given her that love bite as we sat around in the living room with his other gf and also a platonic friend of theirs. But I got over it.

I would hope that if miss pixi ever gets another partner who is comfortable with having sex with her with me in the house, I will find it either sweet or a pleasant turn on like she does... knowing me however, I will get jealous, struggle with it some, but get over it. It would help if she would come to me after her other partner is either fulfilled, or gone, and take care of me sexually. That is what I do with her usually.

edit: she does have sex with Ginger, my bf. I have heard and seen that! Sometimes I am involved, sometimes not. Ginger always takes care of me if I am around when he's also kissing, cuddling or sexing her, if I indicate I want it. Oddly I feel a little more strange when they have sex when I am NOT home!

Kevin, does Lovebunny only have sex with B-H when you're out, or are you OK knowing they are sexing when you're home?
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 62) loving Pixie (poly, F, 40) since January 2009, living together since 2013
Seeing Kahlo (polyish, M, 45)
Master, (mono, M, 36), Pixie's Dom/bf for 3+ years

Last edited by Magdlyn; 03-19-2014 at 01:46 PM.
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