Thread: Mono Vs. Poly
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Old 03-15-2014, 10:08 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by PolyinPractice View Post
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
some people think that what I want in my life is not really poly, since I mostly want lover-friends (my term for FWBs) in my life, rather than more entangled partnerships or boyfriends - as if that can't possibly be loving or I couldn't possibly fall in love with someone with whom my relationship has more casual parameters than most would expect.
Of course FWBs or relationships you go into with solely sexual intentions aren't "poly" relationships....but where do people think romantic, long term relationships come from, anyway? And sometimes you go into something, insisting it'll only be physical, and then feelings develop....
Excuse me, never did I say that my intentions were "solely sexual" in pursuing lover-friendships or friends-with-benefits arrangements. Hello? Friendship takes emotional investment and I am very selective about whom I call a friend. I love my friends, and my relationships with FWBs are very loving and important to me for much, much more than just sex. My lover-friends are not required to bang me in order to spend time with me. Having casual relationships is not the same as having casual sex. While the parameters I prefer for relationships are rather casual, that does not mean I want "no strings" and no heart involved. I have turned down men I was very interested in because they thought that my wanting the freedom to be in multiple, casual relationships meant it was "no strings." A very incorrect assumption! Sheesh.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

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Last edited by nycindie; 03-15-2014 at 10:12 PM.
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