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Old 03-11-2014, 12:36 PM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 822

Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
It's unrealistic to expect that "nothing will change" when he has a baby. Babies change everything! But it doesn't have to be for the worse. If you still love each other, and if the other gf isn't freaking out on you or anything, then just take it one step at a time.

It's not up to the bf's mom to tell you you'll have to "let go" (assuming that means "leave"). It's not her relationship, she doesn't even get a vote. If you three are happy, that's all that matters.

There's no reason you can't also have kids with him, if that what everyone wants. Lots of people do it. Three years is a long time, a big investment, and if this is the only reason you feel you have to leave, then don't make any rash decisions. Just take it a day at a time, see how things work out, and as always keep talking it out!

Best of luck. Whatever happens, life will work itself out. It always does, if you allow it.
I agree. His mother has no place telling you that you should let the relationship go just because his other girlfriend is pregnant. You should definitely let your boyfriend know is mom was meddling. You guys just got a house and moved in together, so obviously things were going well. You love each other and while the news about a baby is unexpected and has thrown you for a loop, that doesn't mean that you suddenly have to leave.

One of my friends recently moved into a house with his partners (he is in a non-sexual relationship with the male). His partners are going to be having a baby. They've all decided that he will be a stay at home dad for the child while he finishes school and that he will father their girlfriend's next child. His father stopped speaking to him when he told his parents he is poly and introduced his partners to them and you know what? My friend is okay with that. It's the first fight they've ever had, but my friend stood his ground and is happily making home improvements and building a nursery. It's possible to continue to feel loved and included even when your partner is having a child with someone else.
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