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Old 03-05-2014, 02:23 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872

I am an alcoholic.. I will make that caveat. I haven't touched a drink in 3 years. So I do have some opinions on drinking and consent.

I think it all comes down to the before. If they gave consent before and needed a drink to relax or chill out. That very different than saying no previously and then getting drunk and suddenly "being available". In your first example just ask to speak with the gf. Otherwise not a chance in hell.

Every amazingly awesome sexual experience I had drunk (and there were a lot) I had sober consent/interest/yes.

In swinging alcohol and even drugs can play a part. *shrugs* depends on the club, location and how public it is. Lots of variables.

Some BDSM and some swinging clubs don't allow booze for the reasons you listed. Just hold yourself to your own rules. Ask the questions you need to ask to feel comfortable. I never went to those, couldn't get comfortable at that time without a couple of drinks. I now go to those clubs, but haven't done anything publicly (sex, beatings etc) since I stopped drinking.

If your problem is with drunk sex in general. As someone who pays close attention to people who drink so I can avoid putting myself in situations which may suddenly turn me into party animal again, its going to be tough to do. you will end up limiting yourself from people who may be very interesting long term. Alcohol may just be what they need to do something like a manysome... (as an example)

Lastly.. when I was drunk, I never.. ever made a decision I wasn't completely cognitive and aware of. I drank on average a 26 a day for 7 years in a party town. Not all people who drink are completely unaware or unable to make decisions. In fact most of my friends (and wife) were/are the same way. Something to keep in mind and another reason why a generic answer won't suit the individual nature of your question
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