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Old 03-05-2014, 12:25 PM
NorthCoastLady NorthCoastLady is offline
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 10
Default Alcohol and consent


Word sure does spread fast. I've been talking about my recent experience with a few of my friends, and lo and behold, I'm getting these propositions- subtle and not so subtle, from various sources. It doesn't bother me that I'm seen as "sexually available". I'm really not, at this time, and my polite refusals have been accepted graciously. What does bother me, is the role alcohol plays in most of these invitations.

"I'm sure my girlfriend would be up for it, if she gets drunk enough"
"We can all go out, have a few drinks, and go back to my place"
"We can relax, drink some beer, and watch a few movies at my house, if that'll make you feel comfortable"

20 years ago, I would have responded with a "hell yeah", but after having a few experiences involving alcohol that skated the edges of consent, I'm very wary and cautious of mixing booze and sex, even with my husband. He and I aren't drinkers as a rule, but if we were, sex wouldn't be on the roster. The truth is that I don't trust drunk people, not even myself.

I'm just wondering how much of my distaste for drunken sexual encounters is purely personal. If I want to dabble into swinging or polysexual fun in the future, how much does alcohol play a role? Sure, I realize that many folks imbibe to lower their inhibitions, it's a culturally accepted thing. It just doesn't seem consensual or very safe to me.

Just thought I'd weigh in on the opinions of others.

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