Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.
Sounds like you are trying to come to grips with the idea of becoming committed to a new relationship and not so "footloose and fancy free." I understand your blocks in communication, I think even without the past trauma most people have more awkwardness talking about themselves and things that may cause conflict. Just communicate a little a time, and don't feel like you have to rush into anything in general.
I generally define poly as "a romantic arrangement between more than two adults, with the knowledge and consent of all." So, what you are currently involved in sounds poly to me.
I just suggest taking maximum advantage of Polyamory.com's collective wisdom, as there is a lot you can learn here. Explore our threads and boards, and see what questions you have.
I hope things work out great with Sam and Sally. It sounds like they have so far.
Kevin T., "official greeter"
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