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Book recommendation: "Sex at Dawn
: how we mate, why we stray, and what it means for modern relationships," by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. Read it yourself, and then ask your husband to read it if he'd be willing to.
When you get done with that, you might also find this second book recommendation to be helpful: "Opening Up
: a guide to creating and sustaining open relationships," by Tristan Taormino. Again, read it yourself first, and then ask yourself if it's something your husband would want to read and if you think he'd benefit from it.
The point in reading these two books would be to establish that *responsible non-monogamy is a valid option for many people.*
It's not to prove to your husband that he's wrong in being monogamous. It's just a way of asking him to consider another perspective.
It's also a way for *you*
to not have to feel like you're crazy just because you desire non-monogamy. It's not wrong, pathological, or abnormal to have non-monogamous desires. Lots of people have them, as the existence of this site attests.
The advice/feedback the others have shared with you on this thread has been top-notch. I just want to add those two books to the equation. Again, start with "Sex at Dawn," and then move on to "Opening Up." That's my recommendation.
Good luck, and keep us posted on how things are going.
Kevin T., "official greeter"
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