DEALBREAKERS (without these, I can't be in healthy relationship here)
(in this order, or some other order?)
- I want my wife to understand poly and other sexual preferences and desires in me without judgement.
- I want my wife to stop doing nagging me and being so negative all the time
- I want my wife to start trusting me by (This one is hard for me because I feel like either you trust someone or you don't and no matter how you try to change your actions, it will show one way or the other) the lack of trust goes back much further than the cheating and is about more than sex. I feel like she holds me to ridiculous standards in life and then doesn't trust me to meet those standards.
WILLING TO BENDS
- If she can trust me, then I am willing to try keep my monogamous marriage even though I don't want monogamous marriage for myself.
UNFILED / COULD LIVE WITHOUT?
- I want to be in an open relationship with my wife. This would be best case scenario for me.
- I want to be able to be open and honest with our sexual preferences, likes and dislikes. In a perfect world we would occasionally even read erotic literature together or watch porn together or at least share an account so we can openly discus the things we liked or didn't like and what sort of limits we might have or things we can try. I think her insecurities combined with her religious limitations will make this impossible though. She once told me she sometimes gets depressed after sex, and she VERY rarely thinks about what I might enjoy or what she wants to do for me. I feel like I do everything in the bedroom to drive her completely crazy and then she spreads her legs and lets me put it in her. lol
That's just not enough for me and I think a lot if it has to do with insecurities making her very selfish in the bedroom.