Ok, I'm just trying to be clear...you are married with 4 kids. Both of you have partners who don't spend time near the house or with the kids? Both of you spend one night away a week while the other cares for the kids? Do you do this on school nights or weekends? Do you have any other help? Like a nanny, housekeeper or relatives? Are the kids older? Just curious about how it works.
If you didn't have your one night a week with a lover...do you think it would be fair to spend one night in a hotel or with a friend?