I have to wonder if being raped right on the heels leaving this guy's place has somehow amplified his importance in your life. Like your brain chemistry isn't working right in this regard.
I would suggest a different therapist. Simply listening isn't getting it for you - obviously. You need someone who can show you how to retrain your thinking.
I am going to suggest you stop being ashamed. (Easier said than done, right?). Look at it this way: you have a medical disorder of the mental variety. I know because they are your thoughts, you feel you should be able to stop them. I believe someone could teach you to do that in conjunction with the right meds. But it is a medical condition nonetheless. If you had diabetes would you be ashamed that you couldn't will your pancreas into making enough insulin? Of course not. You'd make lifestyle changes and take meds. What you are describing is no different. It's a medical disorder of the mind.
Find a new doctor.