Originally Posted by bookbug
I think of an egalitarian approach in terms of behavior. Of course you may not have the depth of feeling for someone you are just getting to know as you would a long time partner, but once you have decided to pursue a relationship with a new person, it means s/he deserves the same consideration as the long-time partner - just as we manage with our non-sexual friends. I don't use a hierarchy with them. I don't value one friend more than another - they all give me something different. So why would I use a hierarchy with lovers?
That new love is a human being with real live feelings; not a play thing that can be ignored on a whim.
Exactly... Why would anyone stick around knowing they would come second to someone else.
Murf's wants and needs are just as important as Butch's. It doesn't matter that Butch has been in my life 13 years. I didn't know Murf 13 years ago.