Hey. Thanks for posting. You sound like you're aching right now, deeply compassionate about your husband and where he is, while also trying to assert your own right to be your truest Self. That's really awesome.
But it also sounds really hard.
This question isn't meant as a hard one, but what's holding you back from trusting him? He's sound like he's trying to be sure that you're doing well. Could you figure out what you need to trust him to love someone else, and then let him actually do it?