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Old 04-08-2010, 02:15 AM
EugenePoet EugenePoet is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 145
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Interesting posts!

I never thought about polyamory until about 4 months ago, but I had the opposite reaction from yours: "Well, that's a good idea and it seems quite natural, too."

You're not "less liberated" than people who are poly, nor is your monogamous marriage less beautiful than a many-loving one. I sit sometimes and watch my mother and father as they talk -- they've been in a perfectly monogamous marriage for 56 years -- and believe me, what I see is beautiful and admirable. I also admire my GF's poly marriage -- on the phone she'll say, "It was such a difficult day, and then D put my chair facing the window and poured me a glass of wine, and now he's making dinner for me while I talk to you." It's so sweet to know a woman I adore is so well loved!

Both sets of behaviors are in the healthy human spectrum. Not to worry.

As far as the anxiety triggered by the discussion of poly, maybe it really is as simple as it seems: you are psychologically committed to an exclusive, monogamous relationship with the man you love. It's what your dreams, self-perception, and your life are based on. Nothing wrong with that.

As everyone on the forum says, talk, talk, talk, and communicate. Bring the incident up with him, gently of course. Openness does bring couples together, even if they discover a mismatch in perceptions along the way.
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