Woah, wait a sec....you wrote 'your wife is willing to let go of her OSO'? So she has not done it yet? Wait she doing, waiting for you to dump yours before she dumps hers? Is she still seeing him, talking to him, sleeping with him all the while waiting to drop him cold as soon as you drop yours?
She sounds like a cold hearted bi-atch sorry, is that the type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Someone so callous?