I'm sorry she reacted to your post the way she did. I do hope she continued to read the rest of the topic before discussing your posts with you. I, for one, didn't think bad or poorly of her. We are all different in how we communicate, act, react and believe. I saw her as a partner who was under a lot of stress and spinning around trying to figure out what was happening to her world. This is not bad, this happens anytime something huge happens in our lives.
For you, SS, I have more questions.
I'm a great devil's advocate you see and always am coming up with questions to get people to think about things either closer or differently. If anything, do as Ariakas suggested and start that journal, use some of the questions asked in your topics here as cues and starters.
Q1: What is the difference between male and female sex to you and why?
Q2: Why do you feel that she would be sharing "your sexual love" with someone else? If I read correctly, she doesn't look at sex the same as you but you seem to expect her to? If she never looked at sex as "sexual love" like you do, she is not sharing "your sexual love" with anyone else. She is sharing sex, plain simple sex.
Q3: It might be good to figure out which parts need to be "labotomized" and which parts just need a little tweaking and reprogramming. Sometimes that is really all that is needed. The fundamental base is still good, it's just some of the other parts that need looking at.
You feel sick to your stomach because of stress, emotions and change. No matter how good you feel about something, a huge change in yourself or your life can have that effect on a body.
You will be ok. Take a deep breath and remember that. Re-center yourself and try to relax a little before taking huge steps. Start that journal, paper or processor. Share here, but more importantly, share with her. Smile. Trust me, you may not feel like it, but it will help. If laughter is the best medicine then a smile is second best.