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Old 04-07-2010, 04:08 PM
kamala kamala is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Deepest Darkest
Posts: 51
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Wow, thanks for the replies everyone

Over and above how irritating it can be trying to defend and explain polyamory to people who just don't want any of it... the cynicism I was kind of talking about was more a question of: "I want to try this awesome thing, meet new people, learn some new things, experiment etc etc" versus "I already know this person is not going to be enough for me, just by sheer virtue of them being only one person, so I may as well just be honest and not even try being monogamous"

The latter seems cynical because you have already decided that there is this inherent lack...

From my brief experience polyamory has been hard work - hard work that I could have just as easily put into a monogamous relationship, ie spent that effort saying, yes, I think about other people, but no, I won't pursue them...

I mean, how many people here would be happy being monogamous if exactly the 100% right person came along, that fulfilled all your needs etc? And if that's the case, is your choosing to be polyamorous a gesture of bad faith in that being a possibility?

I don't mean to come across cheeky or anything. Sometimes I find the answers I'm looking for by following the line of reasoning that seems least logical to me...

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