Originally Posted by Breathesgirl
Did he SAY the two of you were going to be monogamous or did you assume the two of you were going to be?
Most people wouldn't even think to ask if they are entering a monogamous relationship. It's so vastly the majority it would be like asking you're new partner if they were planning on getting a gender reasignment in a couple of years. Non-monogamy is not that widely known about as an option; it only apears to be because we are in it.
Until non-monogamy becomes more widely known as an option for committed relationships, I feel the responsibility falls on the non-monogamous person to make sure thier way of loving is clear. Of course, if you discover you are non-monogamous later in a relationship that is a different story.