Originally Posted by Amanita
... what worked for me was:
1. having good arrangements and boundaries, which help me to feel safe, valued and loved
2. taking things a step at a time - trying to not take huge steps that cause too much pain, but also making sure to keep moving forwards
3. having a relationship with Daedalea that keeps her real to me (as opposed to 'shadowy other woman')
4. taking an active interest in Astraeus and Daedalea's relationship
So far, so good?
#2-- can you give examples of comfortable small steps and uncomfortably huge ones?
#3 I have not met my bf's new interest... it might help, I am sure it will, if they establish an ongoing relationship. But, I havent met her yet and she does feel like a threatening shadow.
#4 How active?
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw
me: Mags, female, pansexual, 59, loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, 37