Thread: Why hide?~
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Old 01-08-2014, 02:40 PM
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YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: SoNH
Posts: 1,341

Having come out of adversity able to better stand up for yourself and handle conflict is a good thing. However, when other people are involved, it gets trickier. Do you fight back when it will impact not only your life, but the lives of those you love? When that fight causes your partners and your children hardship?

It's no longer about you at that point.

My partner is open about who he is. I choose to not lie, but not shout our relationship style from the rooftops. I'd prefer to let my relatives, for instance, get to know the person he is before they judge him for a relationship style that is "hurtful". Maybe that will help, maybe not. Dunno.

As for work, some coworkers know and others don't. It's more of a matter of "need to know" and reluctance to have the style of relationship I'm in suddenly have me seen in a more sexual light around the workplace. Mono relationships don't get thought about, really. Mention "poly" and now everyone's jumping in the sack with everyone else (a common misconception) and I get sideways glances at the workplace. Not cool and not acceptable.
Dramatis personae:
Me: 46/F, Divorced with 2 kids, 2 cats, fish, a tarantula, and a 1930s house with many projects.
Chops: 47/M, Partner of 6 years, lives half-time with me, half with Xena.
Spinner: 52/M, Friend I've been on a few dates with. Divorced, Mono, wrapping his head around it all.
Xena: 47/F, Chops' other nesting partner of 6 years
Curls: 50/F, Chops' partner of 1 year

Supporting Characters:
Choplet: Chops' son
DanceGirl: My oldest daughter
Pokégirl: My youngest daughter