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Old 01-04-2014, 03:47 PM
Justiss Justiss is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by opalescent View Post
However, I do see the strong likelihood of her being hurt. It reads like she is an empathetic person who radiates emotions to her emotionally stunted male partner and now you. You are her first female sexual connection, first female crush. She does not sound experienced at all, and is insecure. Combined with a male partner who does what he wants to get what he wants - and the possibility that she will get badly emotionally burned goes up.
You are very correct in this. I noticed whenever we were sexual she had to get in a "prepared" mood, which essentially is a never sober mind. I'm not sure why she is even claiming to want this when it seems she never initiates it. She does radiate emotions to her partner, and me as well. When the three of us are together, having a great time when sex isn't involved she always makes comments about the two of us being too much, or how she can't take us anywhere. She gets in the role of caregiver and almost mother, instead of equal lover. She places us in a category she is not part of, and almost doesn't want to be part of.

Quote:
You do not seem to be getting much out of this. In fact, I wonder if you were drawn in because he or they felt you were unlikely to mind being used. At any rate, I suggest bowing out, not so much because you may be hurt, but because she is likely already hurting.
*sigh* I'm not, am I? In the beginning it was something nice. I was taken care of, but I know it was bribery, and I allowed it to happen because I liked being spoiled. I knew what it was for, and I would only "give in" when I was in the mood. This was doomed from the get.

He did admit to me, after I told him to fuck off, that he "and" his wife, were happy with this arrangement because I was not one to likely get emotionally attached. His wife stated I was "cold" and that was a good thing. I told him if we were to talk about her, she needed to be involved in the conversation. Him speaking for her was not a positive nor something to be trusted. Again, agendas. I don't like that.

Quote:
She's being distant to you and likely fucking in front of you to try and hurt you - yeah, that's a sure sign of being in pain. You can choose not to contribute to someone else's pain.
And I will. I may not love her, but I definitely don't wish to hurt her. I don't understand how her husband doesn't see this pain. He always says he doesn't do anything he knows she isn't comfortable with, yet during this whole threesome he refuses to let her initiate it on her own.

I think he is the manipulator in all of this, and he basically just wants to have a lover without cheating which would make him lose the marriage he needs to function. She is not comfortable about us engaging sexually unless she is there to watch (control), and I am not in to catering to her fetish which aides in her emotional and mental deterioration. If this was all to blow up I know he'd blame me, and she'd be damaged but stay, and he'd get away with this scott free.

I'm just ranting. Thank you so much for your advice. The red flags and flashing lights saying "GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!!!!!!!!" is working overtime. I haven't heard from them since new years day which is unusual, so I know it more than likely had to do with her discomfort and him trying to cater to that. During our time together in this round she was particularly snappy and crude, and she made bitchy snide remarks about my skin color, and how they aren't taking care of me. It just felt so wrong...
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