Hi all! I'll try to keep my description as brief but clear as possible.
Married to my high school sweetheart almost 20 years. 3 years ago, I confessed to him I was worried that I was having an "emotional affair" with an older man who had become a mentor, and I asked him if he was ok with the feelings I was having. Instead of being repelled, he actually said he'd like it if things got sexual, because he thought that was really erotic. He had never told me because we had only ever been with each other (EVER!) and he thought I would feel he didn't love me if I knew he could so easily "share me."
In the very beginning, I told him I didn't know if I could share him. . .and he said that was fine.
That particular relationship did continue to evolve---but because of circumstances it can't ever be PHYSICALLY sexual, nor is it local. We have a lot of virtual fun though! LOL! I do deeply love him and he adds immeasurable dimension to my life. Realizing what a benefit this other relationship was to ME and to my marriage, I invited hubby to look for a special friend. After several months, he did connect with someone and has been in a long-term relationship with her for about a year now. She knows that I know and I support their relationship. She isn't interested in a relationship with ME, nor am I with her, so that works fine. It IS a sexual relationship, and hubby was very careful and respectful of my feelings as that evolved. I'm fine with that and happy that he has her. She is VERY good to him and very good for him (and therefore good for us.)
So then a few months ago, hubby asked me to consider finding another partner with whom I could cultivate a sexual relationship. He thought it would be good for me (and only fair since he has gotten to experience another person.) I was reluctant at first because of issues with self-esteem and body image, but now I have the most amazing OTHER, who seems to truly treasure me. And I also treasure him. That's about 3 months old.
So WHAT IS THIS? We are NOT swinging, never had a threesome, we don't have multiple partners. . .we both just have each other as well as OTHER love relationships. We have no desire to live with the others or "do life" with them. We are both just open to learning what we are supposed to learn from these other people in our lives who we love. But it sounds so completely unreal and against every social norm.
Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Any success stories, or warnings we should be aware of?
Thanks in advance! Looking forward to learning from all of you!