Welcome to the board, Dragon.
It is much easier to find singles to date. Looking for a couple, wherein you are attracted to one, your wife attracted to the other, and the non-fucking spouses getting along as friends, is like looking for a needle in a haystack.
How about considering dating separately? You get a gf, she gets her own bf? You've just expanded your dating pool A LOT.
So many established couples new to poly pursue this goal, a quad, or, seek a hot bi babe to share in a triad, and are disappointed for years. If you and your wife can learn to be a bit more independent for each other, you WILL find lovers more easily. Sometimes triads and quads develop naturally out of dating singly. And there you go.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
me: Mags, 58, living with:
miss pixi, 37, who is dating (NRE):