I reread your blog a few days back and was struck by the fact that Kip had "been there" for you a lot of times. He seemed genuinely caring and supportive. I think it's reasonable to keep that in mind along with the deception.
You seem to be thinking of maintaining a relationship with him but not acknowledging that you know there has been a lot of deception. Do you think this can work for you? It seems potentially explosive to me. Also, you would be adopting his habit of deception. How do you think you will feel if you have to hide this knowledge long term?
Wrt your 4 way plans, aside from "checking it off the list", what do you want to get out of it? How do you hope to feel? Given the current circumstances, do you think those feelings are likely to occur? What mindset would you need to have going into it, and how well does that match with where you are now?
Sorry that you've been having such a tough time lately!