One of my favorite things about the forum is how people push you to be exact and mean what you write. You are right. This isn't NRE. I also didn't say I was "attached" to this man, I said I get attached to people too quickly.
But I don't think it's in particular about this one guy. I think it's about finally finding someone who MIGHT be interesting. I think it's about how to learn how to date.
Gala - I don't think a lot of my own blowing off people comes from rudeness, I think it comes from ignorance and awkwardness. But you are right, I think i need to figure out how I want to be treated and treat others accordingly.
I put an ad on craiglist so I get many responses. I haven't been comfortable with OKcupid lately. There are a lot of ads on it, and the other day a banner inviting me to be a Mormon! It also reminds me of my ex- and I always end up looking for him there. So, should I respond to every ad? When is appropriate to have an email cutting things off? Do guys here always email after dates? Should a woman do that?
I'm finding a lot of awkwardness because I actually don't know "how" to date. Then, I feel limited because I'm married so the relationship feels limited (perhaps sunconciously) to me. I think if I knew how to date, even, those lingering monogamous thoughts go into it. I'm "looking" for someone long-term. Feels complicated.