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Old 12-27-2013, 06:41 PM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,346

I'm sorry for your struggle.
Please keep in mind-that your body does go back through the process of hormonal change (backwards) that it goes through when you get pregnant. These hormone fluctuations OFTEN cause depression and other effects that we don't think of as being "physical". We consider them psychological, but they are CAUSED by a physical change (hormone reductions).
So in addition to the regular stress of holidays, problematic planning issues in a relationship, poly drama etc;
you have a physical issue that is going on which will create depression and anxiety issues.

Right wrong or otherwise; he's not taking care of you. You can't change him. You can try to express to him what you need; but if he doesn't choose to step up to the plate, you can't make him.

You should go talk to the doctor about your mood. It's NORMAL, but you should be sure that you track it with your doctor. I went through a severe depression that lasted 2 years after an abortion (one I absolutely don't regret) because my hormones didn't adjust properly. I thought it was "just in my head" and I didn't go talk to the doctor. When I finally did; I found out it was something we could have dealt with and avoided 2 years of misery. In the years since, I've had a child and found I have this problem with every pregnancy.

At any rate; your frustration is reasonable, your hurt is reasonable. Your depression is reasonable-but keep an eye on it, it should start to taper off; if it doesn't you want to get help from the doctor for that.
You can't make him change. But you can take care of you. If you are feeling vulnerable and needing more support and he's not stepping up to the plate; ask a friend to be more supportive while you work through this.
"Love As Thou Wilt"
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