Err, hey everyone.
I'm not sure what to say, so I'll just see what comes out.
I'm a 29yo, bisexual, and non monogamous guy. I'm married to a monogamous guy.
I first realised i might be non monogamous a few years ago. The initial impetus was some dis-sastifaction sexually due to our radically different drives and tastes. I loved him, and enjoyed what we did, but it didn't feel like enough. As i pondered the alternatives, i realised the problem wasn't that i wasn't that my relationship with him wasn't good, but that i felt that a single relationship might not be enough for me. I wanted to be open to not only wider sexual experiences, but also, potentially, additional romantic ones.
When it really began to play on my mind, i sat my then fiance down and told him everything. I explained how i felt, how i might not be monogamous. We discussed it at length, and he was actually pretty great about it. We agreed that i would be honest and open about my feelings, and he'd have the power of veto over anything that came along because i loved him, and would never sacrifice my existing relationship for another. He also explained he was monogamous, and wouldn't find additional partners, even if i did.
We got married. Nothing happened on the 'extra marital front' until about a year ago. Since then it's just been hookups, not relationships.
My husband is fine with a sexually open relationship, but he seems averse to romantic involvements, and I'm worried that if i ever fall for another person, my husband will veto it. I got kind of crushy on this one guy and my husband got irritated whenever i mentioned his name. To be fair, i mentioned him alot. I tried to reassure the hubby that the guy doesn't even seem to like me, and if he did, i'd be honest and my husband would have veto, but i'm worried it's confirmation he wouldn't accept another romantic partner. I
To top everything off, I'm an immigrant, and i'm terrified that even telling someone else i'm non monogamous, let alone adding another partner to this relationship, would jeopardize my marriage. And as an immigrant, i have no friends i can even talk this over with. Ugh.
I joined the forum because i really need people to talk to, to share with, to get advice from because right now i'm just some lost, confused guy who's not entirely sure what's going on, or where to go from here.