Originally Posted by nycindie
I don't understand. What happened?
Hey, nycindie. Sorry I wasn't clearer. Grotto isn't upset about things that have happened since he said okay to this - although he does feel that I'm not always giving him enough reassurance, despite him teling me he'd need reassurance. I'm finding it hard to work out exactly what more I can do. He can't think of more things for me to do to make him feel more reassured. He just doesn't feel
reassured right now. He feels very insecure in our relationship.
However, the main point is around the first time I hooked up with Lobe, which was not with Grotto's consent. (This incident
.) In fact, he had explicitly told me he was not comfortable with it and that it would hurt him a lot. And I did it anyway.
I feel like the words I've used in the previous sentence should naturally flow on to me feeling guilty. I still freakin don't. I can't tell if it's a difference in how we use words... or me being a moral weasel... or what. Ech.
Thanks for your thoughts, though! It was very nice to get a response; I'm feeling pretty grim at the moment