Originally Posted by Ariakas
If a man, came on here with the exact same set of core complaints of how the woman is trying to be controlling and manipulative. I would give the exact same advice. Kick her to the curb.
As for paternity. I leave my opinion out. Thats for a legal environment to decide. I do personally believe that paternal parents (both) should have a right and option to visit the child.
How that looks on paper and in their living location is up to courts.
Having the child should have absolutely 0 bearing on whether this person is good for a relationship.
I still say the man is a manipulative douche bag and should be kicked to the curb.
Whereas I'm not even really considering whether they continue their relationship or not because their romantic relationship is of no importance right now. It's about everyone acknowledging who the father of the child is and making sure that baby knows who it's biological dad is and is supported in maintaining a relationship with him. Anyone else on the scene who is a stable and healthy influence and wants to commit to co parenting the child is a bonus.
I maintain that this guy hasn't done anything that suggests he isn't a suitable parent but he may not be a suitable partner for the OP. Especially after all this. Given that it is more likely that he is not the father, I would say that prevents him from being a non biological co parent for this child simply because he shouldn't be "on the scene".