Originally Posted by Dana
I'm confused about why everybody is jumping on the idea that the BF is somehow unbalanced or a bad guy. What did he do? He got hurt when she ranked her relationships and wants the option to know a child who *could* be his? I can't help but wonder if the gender here were (and could) somehow be transposed, if you would all feel the same way. For some people, a baby is a BIG DEAL. If some man were out there gestating a child that could be mine, I'd be very concerned with getting at the truth AND I'd want to know that child. Because he has a penis, he shouldn't care and he shouldn't get to care? Not cool.
If a man, came on here with the exact same set of core complaints of how the woman is trying to be controlling and manipulative. I would give the exact same advice. Kick her to the curb.
As for paternity. I leave my opinion out. Thats for a legal environment to decide. I do personally believe that paternal parents (both) should have a right and option to visit the child.
How that looks on paper and in their living location is up to courts.
Having the child should have absolutely 0 bearing on whether this person is good for a relationship.
I still say the man is a manipulative douche bag and should be kicked to the curb.