Thread: Mono People.
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Old 12-20-2013, 06:02 PM
Spock Spock is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: East Bay California
Posts: 134
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ColorsWolf View Post
You understand my points, but your conclusions are mostly incorrect.~ In my thread "Family Values" I question the meaning and role of such words in U.S.A. society and media.~
Impossible.

My conclusions cannot be incorrect. If the word 'Family Values' can have as many meanings as the word 'polyamory', then my conclusions are mine.

Your conclusion is incorrect; the correct conclusion would be, 'Your conclusion differs'

Let me revisit the post since you affirm that I understand the points.
Quote:
I wonder how many people who actually reject this: if they weren't afraid to declare that they are not going to live a certain way just because it is acceptable to many other people.
You agreed then to my rewording:
Quote:
I wonder how many people who actually reject this: If they were afraid to declare that they are going to live a certain way just because it is acceptable to many other people.
You think my conclusion is wrong, that many people don't reject this of social stigma and rejection?

From your Family Values thread we get the notion that you believe there is no common rubric for family values, but that doesn't mean you, I, and others don't have them.

See, here's the thing; it's oft said in this forum that communication and agreement and negotiation is the basic fabric of a polyamorous fabric. That's the only way it works even in a monogamous relationship! However, society isn't structured to run that way. We have developed over the course of several thousand years multiple signaling and encoded messages as part of a social fabric.

1) The way you talk
2) The way you move
3) The way you dress
4) The things you own
5) The things you do
6) The places you frequent
7) The people you know
8) The places you've been
9) The way you act

You can choose to reject it if you wish, but it isn't as if you aren't aware of these things, and for many people it is an efficient short-hand communication technique. Need help in a store? Look for logos, colored outfits, and uniforms. Need to find a teacher at a school? Look for a specific level of dress (the parents are either dressier or less dressy).

Even at work the concept of a dress code signals the social status of the workers (suits and ties, business casual, casual, etc). Our entire culture then embeds multiple layers of these messages in our lives, media, etc.

So the fact that you see people at Target in red shirts->Afraid of social stigmas. You see people at Lowes with aprons ->Afraid of social stigma. You see people at an office in office-wear ->Afraid of social stigma.

You see parents at schools not wearing slippers & bathrobe ->Afraid of social stigma. You see teachers at school also not wearing yoga pants & tank top ->Afraid of social stigma

Or, at the least, they are aware of the social stigmas and play along because they are afraid of the consequences of social stigma.
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