I was pretty darn down last time I posted.
D and I have since talked. Once. I realized that I don't miss his negativity when he is down - which is often due to low self esteem and a fucked up primary relationship. Pretty sure I'm on the road to over that one.
H and I did have a great weekend, and I got to hang out with the woman he recently started dating (as in going on dates, not relationship) which was really nice and funner than I expected. He is still kind of frustrated that I can have sex with other people when he and I have such a hard time coordinating a time to be sexual. A lot of that has to do with our schedules, though.
B and I have been talking more and are reading the same book right now which made me laugh. H is afraid B is starting to associate more to the connection that I am, but I don't see it. I've been wrong before, though. I did stay the night there one night last week, since it was late and I was tired and didn't want to drive home. I guess I don't really care what we do, as long as I don't get to the point where I expect anything from B or feel like I NEED time with him. FWB, dating, whatever... As long as we're having fun and nobody is getting hurt, it shouldn't matter.
The one guy who agreed to patient turned out to be the exact opposite. Almost every statement was about future plans or goals, and way too many of them included me. I cut off all contact when he didn't stop that stuff when I told him it made me uncomfortable.
The other guy (henceforth R) and I have hung out a few times. More sexual than I expected, but also no pressure. He is very much a "just see how it goes" kind of person which is nice. His wife and I have also hung out and talked a bit. She is an interesting person, too, although I don't see us really making too much of an effort to hang out except for group situations. She has some health limitations, and I am fairly busy, so the effort is going to be lacking on both fronts. We do get along well so far, though.
That's about it. It's not feeling like the holidays at all to me since H and I can't really afford gifts this year. Hopefully going to Y's house on Christmas Day to hang out with her family. Not sure if we'll make it or not, but we shall see!