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Old 12-16-2013, 04:03 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: SoNH
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Default Updates and stuff...

Haven't posted much lately. The holidays get so freakin' busy. Plus, we had two software deliveries at work that nicely ended up coinciding with each other, so when I wasn't going cuckoo at home, I was going cuckoo at work. At least that seems to be lightening up, and I'm just avoiding personnel reviews at the moment.

I found that I was still wound up over Samhain dinner, and P and I had to talk about it some more. I didn't expect his niece to stay, since she and her husband have a one-year-old. Staying late ends up turning into "here, let's all socialize around the tired, crying child" and I wouldn't want to put them (or the little one!) through that. I was hurt that his sister pushed back on the time, though, and I didn't see him push for me. Felt that it was okay that I wasn't there, and that really didn't feel "partnery" to me. I didn't realize that he did push for me, and I didn't realize that there's a past history of his sister getting a bit testy with having to adjust plans to fit other peoples' schedules. I realize it now, and I'm feeling less hurt over it all.

Thanksgiving went well, after the initial hullaballoo with the ex-husband about actually HAVING the kids the night before Thanksgiving. M1 came up and we made ravioli the night before. It's a nice tradition (and my oldest really enjoyed M1's homemade sauce), but I may have to find another dough recipe, since neither kid really liked the raviolis once we ate them. Oops.

The next morning was the road race, and my oldest and I ran the 5k. I was initially reluctant to have my youngest stay at the finish line with P and M1 while my oldest and I ran the big race. Felt too "big poly family" and felt weird to have P/M1 watch my daughter (in a "we're the couple around my kids, not YOU" sort of way). I got over it. It made more sense to do it that way, and although M1 would have bowed out if I'd asked, I didn't feel good about asking to exclude her. It went fine. My youngest didn't really give a rat's ass, and she likes M1 anyway. Guess I plowed through that hangup.

Afterward, I dropped the kids off at their grandmother's, and after socializing with my ex-inlaws a bit, I left for Thanksgiving dinner at P's sister's house. What an amazingly fun time.

So... other stuff going on...
Got a followup post about some other stuff that's brewing in this noggin. I'll save all that talk for that post.

The holidays seem to be a bit more stressful (in addition to all the regular holiday stress) in that they seem, by nature, to be more "Big Poly Family". At some level, I'm okay with it, but this time of year, there's so much group activity, it just pushes that limit for me.

Christmas is ironed out now, and we'll pretty much do what we did last year. M1 was upset, thinking that because it's P's day (on the calendar) with me, that she'd be alone. My plans were up in the air due to my mom's radiation therapy dates being unknown. Right now, though, mom doesn't have radiation until January. M1 can come up and spend Christmas day with all of us, and no worries about feeling excluded on Christmas. However, I don't know if I'm going to explode simply because my mom is staying with me from the 21st through Christmas Day. We'll see if the house becomes Thunderdome and only one leaves.

And yes - Mom had her surgery (full mastectomy) and came through with flying colors! All signs point to them getting all the cancer, and now it's just a matter of going through radiation. WOO!

P and I are planning our trip to NYC in January, and some other trips a bit further out in the year. I'll be glad when the holidays are over, and things get back to being a bit more normal again, although I'm looking forward to the second annual Cards Against Humanity game on Christmas again. Nothing like playing that game with your mother. I think I'm scarred for life.
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Dramatis personae:
Me: Mono. Divorced, two kids, two cats, one house with many projects.
Chops: My partner of ~3 years. Poly. In relationships with me, Xena, and Noa.
Xena: Poly. In relationships with Chops and Noa, and dating others.
Noa: Married, Poly. In relationships with Chops and Xena (individually).

My navel-gazing blog thread: A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
My slightly more polished blog (external): From Baltic to Boardwalk
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