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Old 04-03-2010, 02:56 PM
noob noob is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 58
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Well, it couldn't last forever, right?

I'm still happy and full of NRE but doubts are creeping in right now...

For one thing, M (my other) said last night when we were chatting online that poly "never works." We weren't talking about us, but about some friends of mine who're poly-inclined and having some issues right now. But it made me a little He said something about it being too hard to make it equal...

Like, what does he think we are embarking on here? He knows it's not an affair--because my husband knows about us.

At the same time, though, he totally agrees that received models of marriage and monogamy don't work well--he's been there, done that, married for over 15 years before they divorced, and seemingly has no desire to be married again.

And on my husband's end...I'm not sure now exactly what my husband has given his "blessing" to either. I thought he got what was happening between me and M, and now I'm not sure he really does. He too has been talking about monogamy not working, and how people are too quick to judge other ways. But then, he seems not to really understand that this thing with M might actually, you know, go somewhere...I guess it's hard because M lives far away so it's all abstract for everyone right now.

Where do I go from here when my two men seem not to understand what I am intending? Another part of the issue is it's only been like 2 weeks with M, but we do talk as if we will see each other, and we do refer to "you and me" as a relationship. But even so....regardless of the poly aspect, I don't want to bring up some big "commitment"-sounding thing that will freak him out.

Okay, I'm just rambling. Going to stop now.
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