Originally Posted by nycindie
If you are considering dating someone who is poly and already involved in other existing relationships, then you have to ask as many questions of them as possible in order to get a clear understanding of how they work in relationships. I am very wary of partnered poly peeps and my first question is always, "What agreements do you have with your partner that will affect me?" Sure, go out a few times but try to get to know them and how the dynamic of their partnership operates, BEFORE letting yourself get emotionally involved. Also, make sure you have clearly established your own personal boundaries about what is and is not acceptable to you and make sure your potentials know what they are. Know what you will and will not compromise.....
See, I think the whole NRE excuse is pure bullshit......
In addition, I am not someone who feels any need to have a friendship or shared social life with a metamour
I agree with the above 2 statements.
But, we are all different and we get to figure out how this is going to work for us and for me--- I to like to have a friendship or shared social life with a metamour or metamours. It is not something I would try to force- sometimes there is no interest, but the ideal situation for me is that there is a family/community dynamic.