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Old 12-12-2013, 02:17 AM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Olympia, Washington
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[quickly swallows naughty dab of vomit] Huh?

I'm lucky (that is, I consider myself lucky) that I don't have kids. Didn't plan it that way from the beginning, but it's for the best that it turned out that way, I think.

My younger brother longed to have children for many years before his wife decided the marriage was going to stick. Now they have three (and she won't be able to have any more), and they drive him nuts (and wear him out), but I think he still feels like it's worth it. But then, my brother's not polyamorous. Sometimes I think you have to be some kind of super-achiever (or have super-powers at least) to accomplish both (kids and poly). That and/or, the idea of grouping two sets of kids together so that one (or two) adult(s) can babysit them all while the other two adults go out, makes sense and would make things easier, I think.

That and, in addition, what everyone's described in previous posts here obviously is how they manage and it works for them. I'm sure each family's scheduling solutions will be somewhat creative and unique.

Given the closed V I'm in, only one of us has the tough job of poly scheduling. Both of the guys have me-time to spare, while she (the hinge) pretty much has no me-time. Not that we wouldn't understand if she chose to take time off for herself, but this is something that she feels she must or ought to do for us. How does she manage? Well,
  • no kids,
  • lots and lots of scheduling,
  • superpowers (e.g. time travel). Heh, she wishes ...
But as others have pointed out, you can be poly in spirit even if you can't practice it at the moment. Or you can trade some bit of your time in for poly living. Unfortunately, none of us can travel (except in tandem with the clock) through time. So at the end of the day, the decision to practice polyamory is about priorities and limits. Everyone has them, even those "lucky" enough to not have kids.

With musings aloud,
Kevin T.
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