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Old 12-11-2013, 04:52 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Maybe it is my own prejudice. I would feel completely trapped and overly pressured if anyone wanted or expected daily contact from me. I'd probably run screaming in the other direction, LOL. But I just thought I'd mention it in case he is like me in that regard. I don't think a relationship is necessarily doomed if there is a big difference in how or if certain needs being met. If there are a lot of really great things about somebody and you click on a lot of other levels, one area that disappoints you can just be an indicator of where and how some inner growth and self-awareness can be nurtured., ie., finding ways not to give in to that disappointment, re-examining our belief systems that are behind such needs, and so on. I've always considered relationships to be valuable learning experiences, so if I were in your shoes I'd look at the situation and say, "Hmmm, I wanna be in touch every day, but he doesn't. That is a challenge to me. What can I learn from this?"
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 12-11-2013 at 04:55 AM.
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