Been meaning to post more but life and such things get in the way of internet,
"Freyja" has made headway and has brought the non-monogamy talk to the table with the BF, which went better than expected, which is to say they've had the normal initial discussions and come to some agreements.
Things had been kept very general, but I was brought up in a certain context, not by her, but by him in a positive light, which was unexpected. And he's given the green light for us to indulge in some of the more ecclesiastic actives of ours. (I confirmed this.)
Yes, there is a few details that are being omitted (for the time being), but baby steps being the requested mode of operation for the time being, not an unreasonable course of action.
Originally Posted by GalaGirl
That second bit could be a partial truth. BF is not good with you being the new BF not because of your "YOU-NESS." But because she made you her "unwitting one night stand cheating partner" by lying about that agreement even existing. And BF would not be crazy about ANY cheating partner. She's inviting you think it's YOU -- so you will agree to stay silent?
Could it be that she rather invite you to be a cheating affair partner because she doesn't want to be caught out by either BF or YOU? And the "damage" she is actually worried that honesty at this point in time will "out" is her own poor behavior? She has treated you both with less than honest behavior and less than respectful behavior and the consequence could that both of you could be pissed with her poor behavior if either finds out?
Nope. Frankly if she just wanted to cheat on him and keep it quite, there would be a flat declaration of intent.
I know this from previous history.
Nearly 10 years of history actually, some of it pretty terrible.
We both know the other ones worst
relationship sins and methods pretty intimately, so we don't bother trying to bullshit each other, it doesn't work anyway.