Let me put it to you this way. My marriage was pretty solid when I started my poly journey.
It almost destroyed my marriage. Poly will put a spotlight on every crack and flaw in your marriage and make those flaws magnify.
Poly does not fix damaged relationships. It never fixes what is broken.
Again do the right thing and get your shit together before perusing Polyamory.
The she won't let go is a BS excuse. She can not hold onto you if you do not want her to. Do things the right way. Again it is not fair to drag another person into your shit storm. People are not experiments.
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.