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Old 12-05-2013, 04:38 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by cmurach View Post
Is there a way to make this work? I thought perhaps he could present himself as poly (while I will remain mono), so anyone he goes out with knows he's not looking for anything long-term or serious . . .
Excuse me??!!!??? Where did you get the idea that polyamory only means short-term and nothing serious? There are lots of ways to practice polyamory, and many poly peeps are quite committed, serious, and in long-term relationships. Sure, many poly peeps are into casual sex, but there is a wide range of preferences and practices within the framework "polyamory."

What strikes me about your statement is that you make poly seem like fluff that doesn't matter and so he should present himself that way to avoid falling for someone - and potentially hurting you.

I say, if he wants to date around, that's his choice and you can either accept that and work on YOUR relationship with him, or walk away if you cannot accept it. But if you are going to stick around, you have no business telling him how he should present himself to other women he wants to date. That is his dating life, not yours. However, I have to say that while reading your first post, I just thought the whole situation sounds like a disaster, and full of control issues -- so I am inclined to wonder what the heck benefit it will be to either of you to get together again. Be careful and go slowly. Maybe you should date others, too.
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Last edited by nycindie; 12-05-2013 at 04:51 AM.
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