I am feeling a ton of insecurity and none of it is logical in the least.
Susan has been spending more time with Daley, but she is very quick to say she likes him, not loves him. She still won't tell him how close she and I are though. I really don't think that's it though as I don't harbor any ill will towards him. Sometimes I feel like she's choosing him over me, but it's irrational. She spends much more time with me. We've met twice in person, and are planning two more trips in the first half of next year. Hell, she wants to pay for me to come out next time as it would be hard for her to leave Wineguy in town by himself. So why am I feeling so insecure? I hate this.
On the positive side, Kay is fantastic. We did family pictures this weekend. We love the photographer. She went from being a school administrator to doing photography full time in the last year. She charges a flat rate, takes a billion pictures, cleans them up in photoshop, and delivers a CD full of them and you can print/email them at will.
Oops, sidetracked a second. Back on task. These were casual, so I put on a black t-shirt and told Kay I wanted to wear that with my new black leather jacket over it. Her eyes flashed, and her breath caught. I had never seen her react like that to my appearance. It made me feel really good, even though she didn't actually comment on it.
I sent Susan a phone picture and she had a bit of envy, feeling a little "other-womany". I told her that if she were closer, we'd have loved having her in pictures with us, promising that Kay would feel the same way. I ran it by Kay later and she confirmed, "yes, but we'd have to do a LOT of coming out!" She's been so supportive (and is doing great in school
I'm very proud of her.)