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Old 03-29-2010, 08:43 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Location: Upstate New York, USA
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Originally Posted by confidence View Post
I feel like if I asked him the question you asked about why I need to live my love life by his standards, he would reply with something about the fact that he does not like to see me as "loose" or "slutty" and feels that is what my behavior is. I don't really know how to get around this or if there is a way to do so. I see what I do as identifying people I can be intimate with and pursuing that. Sometimes it works out and I get a lot out of it and sometimes it is a disappointment. But I usually try to learn from the disappointments and I also feel like this is just the nature of life in general. You try and sometimes you fail. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try.
I do suggest you ask, though, so that you can hear the answer directly, rather than speculating. You never know, it might be something completely different than what you have assumed.

If he sees the person that you are as "loose" and "slutty" (and means those both in a negative way) and you either don't see yourself as that, or feel that hose terms are not negative ones, then the two of you have some rather different value systems that you really need to work out if you are to continue in your relationship.

But I really would get the answer directly before going down that path.
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