Originally Posted by LovingRadiance
I woould like to invite you to check out my real life. (I'm NOT being sarcastic). If you are interested, send me a PM and I will send you my real life info for fb. You need not add me as a friend to see it-because it's an open page.
I grasp what you THINK I was saying and meant.
What you are doing is making a few LARGE assumptions that color your opinion of my meaning. Incorrectly.
You say you are picking about being literal. But you aren't speaking in educated literal terms regarding social psychology. Social psychology (the study of how people think about, influence, and relate to one another) is VERY VERY pertinent to the question that KDT asked in this thread.
It's also MY MAJOR in school of which I am nearly finished with my bachelors and about ready to move on to my Masters (to be followed by a phd). It's my heart. It's the love of my life.
You have REPEATEDLY all over the board said you were interested in learning. So-when you vehemently disagreed with me, I posted the necessary info for you to ACTUALLY go read the experts information regarding what I said. I didn't ask you to take me at MY word. But gave you links to expert information, so that you could more easily access what I was talking about-in fuller depth-and hopefully with less confusion.
But-you didn't do that. Interestingly enough, KDT, did. I would reason to guess he's found some interesting stuff, not only written, but about himself too.
At no point was I making excuses for people mistreating others.
BUT-if we want to elicit change, it's necessary to understand the UNDERLYING reasons why people do what they do when they do what they do.
PART of why people do what they do is nurture (learned) but some is nature.
We DO STEREOTYPE naturally and we do stereotype learned.
But-before we go assuming that all stereotyping can be abolished, it's critical to understand that stereotyping at its core is a natural mechanism of humans and that can't be changed.
What can be changed is when and how and why we are stereotyping what.
I don't have time or interest in RE-WRITING all of my studies into this thread so that you can read it and finally realize I'm not being a bigoted bitch. But I was VERY interested in sharing what I have learned-because it could be HIGHLY useful not only in this thread, but in the personal lives of each of us participating in the thread.
Humans DO stereotype naturally. It's a part of who we are. That doesn't mean we can't learn to be more conscious and more careful about it. But to deny that it's true that all humans do it is naive at best.
Stereotyping is a form of classification. We classify all sorts of shit, including people.
We classify (and stereotype) by grade, by age, by gender, by IQ, by physical ability, by color, by number, by date, by time, by size, by shape....
This is a baseline truth.
In order to affect how people USE stereotypes (which is the real issue); we need to understand WHY they use them and WHAT they use them for so that we can help them be more structured and careful in their use of them.
The world isn't as simple as "right" and "wrong" or "black" and "white". There are many things that we do (like stereotyping) that have GOOD uses. For example, we stereotype plants. When dealing with plant life in a new area, we will often assess a plants useful properties and safety for eating based upon certain stereotypes learned from plants in an area we were familiar with. This can SAVE YOUR LIFE. It's a GOOD purpose.
We also stereotype in bad ways (which is what we are all used to talking about) and I won't give examples, because plenty have already been given in this thread. But the issue isn't to abolish stereotyping COMPLETELY. It's to reduce it back to the original purpose it was useful for.
Seriously-as much as you express an interest in learning about new ideas/concepts and understanding people; you should check out some information on social psych, social perception & attributions, classification and stereotyping etc. Do a search on David G Meyers-great info he's put out on the topics. Well written, clearly written, interesting, sometimes provocative and very educational. You might find that A) you enjoy the topic and B) you aren't so dead set on believing I'm some psycho bitch.
My life is fully integrated with a variety of cultures and races and lifestyles enmeshed in a close and large chosen family. You would be hard-pressed to find anyone in my real life-even if they don't like me personally-who would believe that I am remotely racist or sexist. But-I'm not about to pretend that people aren't what they are or don't do what they DO do.
My life interest is the science of why we do what we do. It's what I study, it's what I center my education on. It's what I know.
I understand what you mean.~
I just think a step towards a more tolerant and understanding world might be to consider the possible information about people, but also attempt to get to know them.~
This was my point all along, just those words, I'm sorry for any damage, hate, anger, confusion, and chaotic meanings I have caused.~
This message is for every one I have caused this to.~
I want to be a better person, some times I need help, I have been stopping and thinking about myself and what I want to say before I say it, not just on here but every where, my own family has told me so as well I just haven't actually heard them until now, I'm working on myself: I'm sorry, I can be a better person, the person I want to be, I am trying harder now than ever before, thank you every one.~