Life happened but I'm less frightened
I haven't been here for months, so I'd like to reintroduce my family:
Me, Aquamarine: 35y female, bi?, poly
Kay: 44y female, lesbian, poly, my wife and soulmate, been together over 2y
O: 53y male, straight, poly, lived together some 7y
Last time in April, I wrote that I was perhaps starting something with a close friend of Kay's and that I was dealing with fears about it.
However, life happened and took practically all my energy. I could not properly focus on the new/potential relationship. Although some serious stuff (the life part) was going on, me and Kay got married during the summer. In the wedding, Kay's friend was her maid of honour and O was my best man, and I found that quite comforting. After all the wedding hassle and some not-so-fun stuff taking all my and Kay's time, I've had a few quieter momets during the autumn. However, Kay's friend is traveling constantly due her work. I've felt me and her have somewhat drifted apart because of being busy all the time. So, I don't know if I'm getting anywhere with her, but it seems the situation is not a disaster either.
On the positive side, besides our wedding, O seems to have found a new lady friend. I'm really happy for him, because I feel he has quietly suffered from my close and passionate relationship with Kay, him being more on the background. This is my interpretation in spite of him approving my and Kay's relationship all along. Now it seems he's got a chance to develop something genuine with this lady.
Finally an observation about my sexual orientation: although I had been proud of my bisexual identity over a decade, during the past 2 years I haven't missed sex with men (telling something about the nature of my and O's relationship). I wonder if I turn out to be a lesbian, but that does not actually matter very much any more, although losing my bi-identity bothered me earlier.
Just wanted to update our situation a bit, as our life seems to be quite balanced at the moment.