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Old 03-28-2010, 10:51 PM
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Breathesgirl Breathesgirl is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 833
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My primary & I will be at the five year mark in May .

How do we deal with issues? We talk, talk and talk some more!

If it's me that's having the issue I do research on it so I can get a better handle on things before I talk to them about it.

I've spent hours at xeromag, here, my poly groups, journaling on Live Journal, talking to friends who are poly what ever I can think of in order to better understand the issue I have, why I have it and how to better deal with it.

This is my first poly relationship & I have had issues. They were my issues, I owned them & we dealt with them together. I will still occasionally have an issue with jealousy or something. I head back to xeromag, reread the article on fixing the refrigerator, do some more research and talk some more. It all works out.

If you'll look a little closer you'll see that it's not ALL about problems with poly relationships. I know Mono and redpepper have a thread going where they detail the good things that are happening in their relationship together, and with her husband and family. I've got a thread going as well where I post the good things that are happening in my life. These are threads which are not used daily so they don't show up on the quick links very often so you don't see them unless you actually search for them.

We talk about anything and everything. I let him know I'm having a problem & that I will talk to him about it when I feel I'm ready to do so. He accepts this and goes about his business, asking gentle questions along the way, until I'm ready to talk about it.
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