We've survived two days since his realization. Neither of us wants to break up. After lots of soul searching I agreed keep trying until our contract expires in July 2014. All this has been negatively impacting my performance at work, sapping all my energy. I asked and he agreed to delay formalizing with the new girl and to not fuck the latest girl...I HATE WRITING THOSE WORDS...until I can get through the holidays, family visits and work obligations, so its 40 days.
I'm relieved but I also feel a bit of a failure, asking for agreement on limits on their behavior. But I'm doing the best I can. I can't believe how many times I'm cycling through the negative emotions. What I know is that I made this agreement so I can't keep punishing him for it, I'm deciding to stay the 8 months and god help me I want to feel better about the whole thing. I can't spend this time planning my exit, I really want to give it an real try. I want to fee better so I can stay with him and not sacrifice my well being in the process.
Me: mono, 52, serving S in a PE relationship for six years, living together since April 2012
S: has been poly since he can remember, 37
A: His new girl, under consideration